Annie Lane, syndicated columnist

Dear Annie: Christmas is around the corner, and my mother has asked me to host Christmas at my house. (Roughly 30 people will be there.) I do not feel my house is big enough, and hosting an event at my house gives me extreme anxiety! I hosted last year, but only because I was guilted into doing so. My house is just average size, but it’s the largest of my sisters’ and mother’s. While everyone seems to be having a good time, I’m constantly worried about how cramped we are, how messy my house is getting, if there’s enough food, etc.

I can’t enjoy myself. I really do not want to host again, but don’t know what to tell them. Please help. — Not Feeling the Christmas Spirit

Dear Not Feeling: The magic word is “No.” It really is that simple. And though you truly don’t owe anyone an explanation, you have an easy one to reach for, if you must: You hosted last year. It’s someone else’s turn. Let them huff, hem and haw, and sort it out amongst themselves. But stand your ground. If you agree to host again and end up resentful, you’ll only have yourself to blame.

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