ANNIE LANE

Dear Annie: I’m an avid gardener in a suburban neighborhood, and in turn, I meet lots of neighbors. There’s one lady who keeps stopping by with questions about her yard, which I’m happy to help answer. She even asked if I would go with her to the local nursery to help her select new plants for her garden bed, to which I agreed.

She canceled at the last minute via text. No apologies were given. Since then, she’s knocked on my door and continues to text me with questions without a please or thank you. Her last text said she was able to pick up plants on a specific day but wasn’t feeling well enough to plant them (hint hint). All this after I’ve told her no, this doesn’t work for me.

My husband suggested quoting her a rate for my services. However, I have no desire to communicate on any level with her. Is it rude to block her and ignore her? — Plant Peeved

Dear Plant Peeved: It’s not rude to stand by your boundaries. You were generous with your time and knowledge, and when someone repeatedly disrespects that, they lose their access to it.

You’ve already told this woman no, and she hasn’t listened. At this point, blocking or ignoring her may be the only way forward. Since you’re neighbors, if you prefer to keep things cordial, you could send a brief and final message recommending a local gardener or service she can contact instead if she wants to.

Friendship of any sort should be a two-way street. You don’t deserve to be taken for granted.

Dear Annie: In spite of being somewhat of an introvert, I have always been able to make good friends throughout my life, from grade school through college through each new job. However, since my husband and I moved 10 years ago to a retirement community out of state, I have been unable to make a single friend to just do simple things with, like grab lunch, go shopping, see a movie, etc.

I tried joining clubs, volunteering and participating in sports, but no one seems to be interested in being friends outside said particular activity. Some people have shown an initial interest, and we’ll do something together, but after one or two times, they disengage. I give up after a few attempts to get together as I figure the ball is now in their court to follow up.

I am well groomed, intelligent, funny, friendly, kind, and I keep a nice house. I just can’t figure out where I am going wrong or what else to try. Is that just the way it is after 70? Thanks for any insight you can provide. — Waiting On A Friend

Dear Waiting: You’re not doing anything wrong, and this isn’t just “how it is” at your age. Making friends later in life is almost a universal challenge, especially if your peers are settled into their routines or have solid, longtime circles.

You’ve taken all the right steps. Sometimes, deep friendships grow slowly and from regular connection, not just instantly hitting it off with one another. Keep showing up, staying involved, putting yourself out there and being yourself. The right friends for you are still out there, and you’re the kind of person someone’s hoping to find.

Dear Readers: Mother’s Day arrives each year draped in flowers, breakfast trays and hand-drawn cards, but beneath the surface it carries so much more. It is a day of celebration, yes, but also one of reflection, gratitude and sometimes quiet ache.

To the mothers who are in the thick of it, wiping tears, packing lunches, offering hugs with one hand and advice with the other, you are doing sacred work. You may feel tired, unappreciated or unsure, but you are showing up. And that is everything.

To the grandmothers who still make everything feel like home, whose stories, recipes and quiet strength keep generations grounded, thank you. Your legacy lives in the love you pass down.

To the women who have lost mothers, and to the mothers who have lost children, this day can be tender, and your grief is not forgotten. You carry love that has no end, and that love matters deeply.

To the aunts, godmothers, stepmothers, foster mothers and women who mother in all the quiet, unrecognized ways, your care counts. The world is softer and stronger because of you.

To the daughters, grown or growing, who are finding their way, often learning from or in spite of their mothers, know this: The love you carry, the boundaries you build, and the healing you pursue are all part of the story of motherhood, too.

And above all, to the mothers past, present and future, who give so much of themselves without asking for anything in return, you have shaped lives with your sacrifices, your strength, and your fierce love. Today we see you. We honor your hard days, your silent prayers, your small joys and your immeasurable impact.

Mother’s Day is not just a holiday. It is a tribute to the resilience, warmth and wisdom women pour into the world every single day. However you spend today, surrounded by loved ones or sitting quietly with memory, may you feel seen, appreciated and deeply loved.

Happy Mother’s Day.

Dear Annie: Lately, I’ve had a couple of people I barely know ask me if I go to church. I find the question surprisingly personal and uncomfortable to answer. The truth is, I don’t attend church, but I still consider myself a person of deep faith. I listen to gospel music every Sunday, pray daily, and believe in God and Jesus.

I stopped going to church years ago after a beloved minister and his family — who had faithfully served the congregation for decades — were abruptly dismissed under circumstances that were never explained. That experience left a lasting impression on me and made it hard to trust organized religion.

What also troubles me is the way some churchgoers have supported political figures whose values, in my opinion, contradict the core teachings of Christianity. I find it deeply hypocritical and disheartening. I don’t want to get into political debates or feel forced to defend my beliefs, especially with people I’ve just met.

How can I respond to this question in a respectful but firm way that sets a boundary without making things awkward? — Perplexed by the Question

Dear Perplexed: You’re not alone. Many people feel uncomfortable with overly personal questions, especially when they touch on religion or politics. Just smile and say, “I have my own way of connecting with my faith.” Then change the subject. You don’t need to defend your beliefs to anyone.

“How Can I Forgive My Cheating Partner?” is out now! Annie Lane’s second anthology — featuring favorite columns on marriage, infidelity, communication and reconciliation — is available as a paperback and e-book. Visit http://www.creatorspublishing.com for more information. Send your questions for Annie Lane to dearannie@creators.com.