Annie Lane, syndicated columnist

Dear Annie: Eight years ago, my husband of 28 years divorced me, after I had discovered evidence on my computer of him having multiple affairs. Before our divorce was final, my soon-to-be ex visited a mail-order bride overseas and brought her back to our home. He wanted to bring her to my oldest’s wedding, but my oldest said no.

My ex has since married and moved out of state, and three of our four children have moved far away to the East and West Coasts, except for the oldest, who, with his wife, lives an hour away from me. I am on disability and living in income-based housing, and I do not have a car. My youngest three keep in fairly regular contact with me, via phone and Facebook and also, once every few years, for in-person visits. I used to be in fairly regular contact with my oldest, driving to their place once every six months or so for dinner.

Gradually, our communication became less and less until he stopped returning my voicemail messages. (I stopped trying about two years ago.) For a while, every three months or so, I’d message him a short private note via Facebook Messenger, but I stopped that, too, because he didn’t respond. I have since learned that he does not communicate with his siblings either. Last I heard from them was a postcard with their new address about a year ago. I see on Facebook that he and his wife regularly see her parents. They are quite well-to-do and have get-togethers with their children and families in timeshares around the state. I do love them and am hoping they allow me to be in the picture if/when they have children.

I just don’t know what, if anything, I should do. — Mom Missing Her Son

Dear Mom: There are few things more painful to a mother than being alienated from her child. Since you didn’t mention a fight or a falling out, it is definitely concerning that your oldest son has cut off contact with you and with his three siblings. My hunch is that he has not recovered from his father’s infidelity and attempt to bring a mail-order bride to his wedding.

I would write your son a letter at his new address and explain that you are willing to do whatever it takes to mend the family that your ex-husband has damaged so much. Explain that you and your other three children miss him terribly and want to be a part of his life.

“How Can I Forgive My Cheating Partner?” is out now! Annie Lane’s second anthology –featuring favorite columns on marriage, infidelity, communication and reconciliation — is available as a paperback and e-book. Visit http://www.creatorspublishing.com for more information.

EDITOR’S NOTE: Send your questions for Annie Lane to dearannie@creators.com.